Dear New York City,
Hello! This is Fork. I know this is a little awkward, me writing you a letter instead of just telling you how I feel, but I find myself able to organize my thoughts better this way. And I don't want to say the wrong thing.
You see, I'm sure you've noticed that you and I have been on-again, off-again for the past year and a half. I just sorta feel like we need to sit down and talk about our relationship and where you see it headed.
First, let me just say we've had some great times together. I mean, you're GREAT FUN. Everything I could ever want to see or do or be...I mean, it's all in you. Theatre, parks, museums, opera, history, concerts, ukulele lessons, creepy amusement parks, dangerous neighborhoods, hotel lobbies, fine dining...it seems like there's nothing you don't do.
Sometimes I sit in my little tenament and think, "Wow. I can't believe I'm here. I can't believe you're mine! ALL MINE! I mean, geeze!"
And therein lies the problem.
See, sweetie, I kind of feel like you've ruined me for all other places.
Please don't take that the wrong way. I mean that in a GOOD way, honey.
I mean, a good...problematic sort of way.
What I'm trying to say is I don't think we're going to be together forever. I know, that sounds really bad, but come on. Let's face the facts: You're a really expensive date, for one thing. And you're always going. You just don't know when to stop. Someday I see myself wanting you to be quieter and greener and for you to speak English a little more often than you do. And it would be foolish of me to expect you to change. I don't want you to change.
So the only option is for me to change. Or find somebody new.
You know that South Carolina has been trying to woo me for several months. And I've been seriously thinking about all she has to offer. There are definite upsies and downsies to her. I mean, she's a REAL lady. She knows how to pretty herself up and be genteel. She's not LOUD. She's not DEMANDING. And what's more, she's making me all these promises about wealth and security and in exchange, all she wants is my dreams and aspirations. And. Well. YOU, of course.
She's is a little overweight. She doesn't have your figure. But I think I could grow to love her. In her own way.
I mean, I'll never love her the way I love you. What we have is special.
But the problem is, I've worked all my short 28 years to meet someone like you. No--to meet YOU. Everything has built up to this relationship we have right now.
So how can I leave you for someone else?
Okay. The ball is in your court. I'll wait for your reply. Please make it as unemotional as you can. And remember, no matter what happens, you'll always be my "goil". ;^)
Love,
Fork
1 comment:
Dear Forky, my dearest, lovely new friend. I know your feelings for me. I do. I know that I've seemed pretty distracted at times and that we've been a little crazy as far as the time we've gotten to spend together. And, I know that you need answers, and you need them now, but I'm sorry to say, that I just can't give them to you. You see, I'm a free spirit. I can only love you back if you let me be free, you give your all, and if you trust me, long term. That means dealing with my tantrums along with the days like today. And I'll admit, I'm a flirt. I flirt with other people sometimes. I can't help it. It seems like I care about everyone else but you.
This is some tough goings... here with me. So, you have my permission... you may leave me... for the portly chick. You may settle down and even get a little portly yourself. But let's get real... in a few years, you'll be pulling out old photos of me and God knows what you'll be doing with them to relive the moment we shared. It is up to you. If you want to be a part of it... I think you can make it here, with me. I do. I can't stop you from taking this road. You must do what you must. Because it is, in fact, up to you.
Yours, (maybe, we'll see)
New York, New York.
(Kindly transcribed, courtesy of FCS.)
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