Sunday, August 14, 2005

Ask Nelson!



Dear Nelson,
What’s this I hear about you being part schnoodle? I thought a schnoodle was a half-schnauzer, half-poodle mix. How can you be half-dog? You’re a cat.
-Confused in Topeka

Dear Confused,
As I was found in the woods as a feral kitten, many have attempted to romanticize my origins by suggesting that I’m half-cat, half-some other animal. This half-schnoodle thing is news to me. I’ll add it to the ever-growing list of creatures that folks seem to think I’m related to. Here are a few of the more popular ones:

  • Raccoon
  • Long-Tailed Piglet
  • Weasel

And now schnoodle. Let me assure you that, as far as I’m aware, I’m 100% all-American felis domesticus and proud of it! Thanks for the question. Hope this clears a few things up.

-Nelson

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Nelson.

No offense, but I totally wish you were a schnoodle. You'd be cuter, and maybe a little friendlier too.

I really just wanted to "comment" here because I think it's really weird that the lunch posts get more comments than any other. Yo.

Fork said...

What do you mean cuter? Friendlier? I see how it is. See if I come snuggling up beside you the next time you're at my apartment!

-Nelson