You Say A Little Pray'r Fooooor Meeee

So I may soon be taking care of an enormous, rent controlled $700 a month apartment one and a half blocks off Times Square.

You remember Mrs. Yuck, don't you? That agéd poodle I took care of a couple of times for Looney Leena? Well, Looney Leena used to be a world-class, top-of-the-line executive assistant (think assistant to Trump's right hand man) but New York City got to her and she has since frittered away her inheritance on silly pursuits like baking classes, stage managing, and the like.

So she needs money. And serious money.

And it looks like it may be waiting for her. In Europe.

We're at about an 85% likelihood that she's going to need someone to sublet for TWO OR MORE YEARS.

Now, I don't know. I'm cautious. Because the best laid plans and all that... but for $700 a month, I could get my life back. And New York City could become fun again.

The big catch is we'd have to somehow trick the landlord for two years. When they stop seeing Looney Leena coming up and down the stairs and they see me instead...they're bound to think something's up. These landlords are always looking for reasons to kick out tennants--especially when the apartment they're living in could go for $3,000 a month EASY. And they're only paying $700.

So cross your fingers and say a prayer that the Second Great Depression hits sooner rather than later so the landlord will be desperate for paying tennants of any kind.