Friday, May 12, 2006

Best Ever - Week 19

We all know blogs are a fun place to voice opinions, be they about politics, the absurdity of DeathUVs and their female drivers, looming hurricanes and how to stop them, the Antichrist, Cartoon Riots, Pagan Holidays, and Tom Cruise.

But sometimes all this spouting can make us forget what's really important.

That's why we on the 42nd Floor have decided to usher in the weekend by making all Friday posts chock-full of sunshine and optimism, focusing on what we consider to be...

THE BEST EVER
week 19

There are a few things in life I'd really rather not have. Bad acne. Seven fingers as opposed to the traditionally conservative ten. Male pattern baldness. A job at a paper mill. A forked tongue. Kidney stones.

But if there's one thing that would make me genuinely depressed to have, it'd be peanut allergies.

If I came down with peanut allergies, I know I'd cry real salt tears. Into my pillow. Every night. I might even decide to end it all by drowning myself in the one thing I love more than my nine toenails:

Peanut butter. Rich, creamy, Someone-help-I-can't-stop-eating-this PEANUT BUTTER.

Since the trans-fat scare of '05, my journey to peanut butter, like my journey to abs, has been a long, treacherous one. I weaned myself off the processed stuff and made the switch to organic. I taught myself to stir thoroughly before going to town with a spoon and a glass of milk. I found a brand I love. And I'm never going back.

What joy is mine.

The mere thought of globbing a heaping spoonful of this...this manna into my drooling mouth makes me smile a little bit.

And that's why Creamy Organic Peanut Butter is this week's Best Ever.


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A Child's Bedtime Prayer
Thank you for this day and please
Don't give me food allergies
Inherited from dad or mudder
So I can still eat peanut butter.

12 comments:

Moderator said...

Peanut butter is fucking delicious.

Fork said...

Way to be enthusiastic! I think so too!

AmberO at Sleeping is for Sissies said...

Organic peanut butter is gross. All glumpy and separated. I like good ol' processed Peter Pan peanut butter -- the kind with honey. And if you say anything about trans-fats, I will come downtown and kill you.

Queen, III said...

I LOVE peanut butter with apples - especially Granny Smith!! LOVE THEM! I probably eat more peanut butter than I do apple.

Fork said...

Your comment made my heart frown a little, A-Dub.

You're supposed to stir it, then refrigerate it. That's what keeps it from being glumpy.

And trans-fats in any amount are bad for you. Would you eat rat poison in moderation?

All I'm saying is you're missing out. Big time.

Seth Ward said...

lol. rat poison is definitely overrated. Peanut butter is a fine fine thing my friend. Going to get some organic tonight. thanks for the inspiration.

AmberO at Sleeping is for Sissies said...

That's it. I'm on my way down there. I warned you, Forky!!!

AmberO at Sleeping is for Sissies said...

By the way, bite me. According to the USDA, there is no trans fat in any peanut butter! So you've been eating glumpy for no reason! HA!

Anonymous said...

I'm with Grant Miller.

Tracy said...

Peanut butter is the butter of Heaven.

Anonymous said...

Just bought some tonight!

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