Sleep

I sent out a rather cryptic prayer request to some of you a few nights ago that has left a lot of you guessing as to what in the world is going on out here.

I've been hesitant to talk about it, as I already tend to lean toward the more sensational explanation of things.  Except when something sensational DOES happen--then I become a bit of a skeptic.

When I was a kid, I thought I saw a halo around this man who was preaching during our Mexico mission trip.  I decided it was a miracle and told everybody about it with an air of saintly piety that would have made Joan of Arc blush.  But then I learned that if you look at something too long, your eyes get tired and you start seeing all sorts of blurry colors and things.

So, for fear of this being a similar sort of thing, I've restrained myself until I could get a little more information.

We'll start with the most basic part of this story.

Regardless of what conclusion we land on about what REALLY happened, Sleep Paralysis is, apparently, a THING.

So that's at least something.  If the rest of this turns out to have been a dream or my imagination, okay.  The main thin is, this is something that DOES happen to people and my experience fits the description.

What is Sleep Paralysis, you ask?  It's basically when your mind wakes up, but your body is still in "sleep mode" and hasn't caught up with your brain.  So you can think lucidly, but you can't move.

Okay.  Great.  Fine.  It's annoying, but eventually your mind and body get it together and you wake up for real.  Nothing wrong there.

Oooh, but that's usually not ALL that happens during these episodes.

It seems that most people do not have pleasant experiences when they awake in this state.  That is, they don't feel cozy and snug in their beds.  Rather, they virtually always describe feeling an intense evil or dangerous presence in the room WITH them.

This has happened to me twice since arriving in France.  The first time I just remember THAT it happened.  I don't remember anything else.  The second time, however, was a bit of a different story.

But before I go into the details of what happened, let me give you a little background.

I had unwittingly learned about Sleep Paralysis--what it is and how to stop it--while doing some research in the Internet Rabbit Hole that is the UFO phenomena.  Scoff if you like, but this, like Sleep Paralysis, is also a THING.  People want to know about them.  Christians want to know what they are and if their faith in YHWH and Jesus Christ could survive if one day they turned on the news and saw ships in the sky.

Sleep Paralysis is also connected with what is commonly known as alien abductions.  Again, people are sleeping, they are unable to move, they feel something in the room with them... only they may actually SEE things and feel the things touching them, etc.

Seems like a pretty awful thing.  You're lying there in the dark.  You can't move.  You can't defend yourself.  Looks like you're stuck.

Aha, but there is one thing you CAN do.  You can call on Jesus Christ.  Yeah, I know.  It's crazy.  But it's true.  There is a spiritual side to all this.

The first time this happened to me this past spring, I remember feeling there was something in the room that hated me and wanted to eat me.  No joke.  I remembered in a FLASH what I was supposed to do.  I SCREAMED the Name with every fiber of my being--but I remember vividly that I wasn't just calling a name.  I was calling TO HIM because I knew He was the ONLY ONE who could help me at this point.  My mouth wasn't working and the only thing I could get out were the vowels ("EE-UHH!!!") but that apparently was enough.

It stopped INSTANTLY and I could move again.  A feeling of peace such that, after I thought about what had just happened, I was able to go back to sleep.

Fast forward to a couple of nights ago.

I was asleep.  The first thing I remember in the sequence of events was waking up ALREADY SHOUTING the Name.

I could hear footsteps in the house, in the room outside mine.  I could somehow FEEL that something was in the house.  Then there was the sound of the door downstairs opening and closing.  Impossible, I thought.  I locked the door and left the keys in it.  There's no WAY someone could just open the door and come inside!

Then I heard the floorboards in my bedroom creak, right by the foot of my bed.  At that point, I really began to panic, and I redoubled my efforts to say the Name as clearly as I could.

There was another sound of the front door somewhere below me, and more creaking on the floorboards in the room outside my bedroom.  Then my eyes snapped open and I saw a red glob disappearing into the ceiling.  You see weird colors in the dark all the time--it's what our eyes do as they search for something to SEE.  But I can't EVER remember seeing RED before.  Red, oval-ish shape.  I could move again and I rolled over and snapped on the lamp.

Just like the first time this happened, the feeling of panic and fear melted away with my ability to move again.  In other words, whatever I thought was in the house with me had gone.  I sang a verse of "Jesus, Name Above All Names" (what else do you do?) and I fell asleep again.

The next day was kinda bad.  I was angry and crabby the whole morning.  I kept thinking about things that made me upset.  Maybe some sort of PTS.  I don't know.

As the day went on, I decided that I must have dreamt the whole thing.  That it was probably just a neighbor coming in late (uhh...4am?  Hey, it's the only logical explanation).

I couldn't even remember the floorboards upstairs ever creaking.  It was probably just in my head.  I was ready to go with the scientific explanation--that these sounds or things people see are just a normal, physiological response to finding yourself vulnerable and unable to move.  Hallucinations.

So I went upstairs to my bedroom and walked around for a minute.  No creaking anywhere...except...

Yep.  That spot by the foot of my bed.  Creaked nice and loud when I put my weight on it.


Still, I couldn't quite believe what happened wasn't all just in my imagination.  I mentioned it to a friend of mine who is a relatively new Christian who had been involved in attempting astral projection (don't worry, you don't need to know) and he assured me that the "limbo" between waking and dreaming is a kind of glimpse behind the veil.  That these things are very real.


Last night, however, as I was brushing my teeth around midnight, I heard the sound of a door shutting. It sounded EXACTLY like what I'd heard a couple of nights ago.  But now I knew what it was.  It was a neighbor who had just come in (we even exchanged "bon soirs").

So okay.  We've got the fact that Sleep Paralysis is a real thing.  And the sound of doors opening and closing was probably just this neighbor who came home at 4am.  Sure, why not?


This morning after our trip to the farmer's market, I sat and had coffee with one of the students.  She asked how I was liking the place and we talked about the view of the valley and the little gardens and river.

She's been living here taking classes for two years.  She told me that, when she first moved here, she had the bungalow downstairs (the house is divided into an upstairs area and downstairs) and that, while her view was good, she knew the upstairs one was even MORE amazing.

I thought I'd ask her...

"Hey, when you stayed here, did you find that when your neighbors would open and close their doors it would sound like YOUR door?  It's so weird.  I find it kind of alarming, actually, because it sounds like it's coming from MY apartment.  Like someone just let themselves in and are walking around inside my apartment.  It really freaked me out the other night around 4am."

She gave me a funny look.  Took me a second.  Then I realized it was a look of recognition.

"How easily freaked out are you?" she asked.

"I'm good," I said.

She then went on to explain that there's something very ODD about this house.  That people who stay here for any length of time consistently report having had "visitors" in the night, usually little things, like children.  I got the impression that's actually why she requested a move.  But the owners of the art school--who are aware that funny things happen here--continue to rent it from the landlady because she gives them a good deal.

Then I remembered something.  The owner of the school told me, the day after the night of the second occurrence, that he had received a letter from the landlady asking if I liked the house.  But he asked in such a curious tone that my response was, "Why?  Should I NOT like the house...?"

The girl I was talking to went on talking about new agey things--suggesting I use sage to ward off evil spirits or try "making a deal" with them.  She suggested I mention it to the owners of the school.  She seemed curious as to why I wasn't more frightened.  I guess I could point her to the part in Matthew where Jesus gives His followers power over demons and spirits?

So that's what happened.  I feel like I can post about this now because I have more information.

1.  Sleep Paralysis is a Thing.  It happens.
2.  The floorboard in the middle of my room creaks when you stand on it.
3.  Weird things involving demonic ghost children are said to happen here on a regular basis.

There's a lot more to this--thoughts as to WHY this happened (these sorts of things are not "supposed" to happen to Christians)--but I won't go into it.  The big thing I learned from this one was this:

When the episode was going on, I remember saying the name "Jesus" as a magic word.  I wasn't calling TO HIM, I was just throwing the Name out as if it, by itself, would do something.  Since coming here, I have not had much contact with my Christian friends, I haven't prayed almost at all, my Bible study time has dwindled, and I've indulged heavily in France, France, France, and haven't thanked God ONCE for any of it.

The thing is, I haven't really been walking with the Lord.  Not closely anyway.  

At some point in all our lives, we're going to die and we're going to call out to Jesus.  That name is not a magic word.  It's the name of a PERSON.  And if you are using that name as a magic word to save you, you need to be careful.  Because He even said that lots of people would use His name to do all sorts of things, but He will turn to them and say, "I'm sorry.  I have no idea who you are."  

It's not enough to SAY you're a Christian.  You have to actually BE one.  You have to KNOW HIM and WALK with Him.  If you don't, THAT'S when you're truly vulnerable.  You have to throw yourself at His feet and acknowledge that there is nothing you can do to save yourself--that it's all HIM.